Sunday, July 24, 2005

growls...

i just read this
blog written by an officer of the law and want to point out a few facts.

"Currently, dog-bites are classified as either "dog out of control in a public place" or "nuisance, animal".

this is unfair. i know a few dogs - one of which used to live with me until she went to the great park in the sky - who have been accused of being 'violent' when all they were doing was their job; ie - to protect their human and home. what happened to my colleague (who, by the way was a small, aging and partially deaf russell with only 12 teeth left) was that a parcel delivery person knocked loudly at the door, and when the human opened the door, the parcel person started shouting loudly and waving and kicking at my friend. naturally, she thought the man was going to attack her human, and bit the man on the ankle before giving chase. she spent her last few months on this earth with a death sentence hanging over her.

i myself admit to 'having a pop at someone'. said person was teasing me and shouting at me in my local park, and suddenly lurched toward me in an extremely threatening manner, so naturally i defended myself. i'm a small dog, but i still stopped him with the help of a human friend. i am not a violent dog by any means. it was a case of self defence. should i be classed as 'out of control' because some idiot tried to attack me?

"Solving a crime involves interviewing the offender, in this case the dog. So, I interview the dog (who usually exercises his qualified right to silence), the dog signs using his paw and, because the interview has to be PACE compliant, there is an appropriate adult present in the form of the dog owner."

well big 'duh' on this one. of course we 'take the fifth'. most humans don't understand dog in the first place and translators are extremely rare. my human is one of the few i know that can interpret correctly, and secondly - when are we ever asked if we would like a solicitor present? never! mind you, the chances of finding decent legal representation in london is low, let alone getting one that will work for bonios.

my last growl for the police man, is that a while ago i was burgled. a fox snuck into the kitchen of my home and stole my biscuits and a rather tasty pigs ear that i had been saving 'specially. i barked at a passing officer of the law to report the crime, and all he did was to pat me and say "hello boy, you're a nice little fellow aren't you". so much for powers of observation - i'm a bitch thank you very much indeed. did i get justice? grrr....

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