Monday, October 24, 2005

hello again, sorry it's been a while between posts, but i've been rather busy, and also it's starting to get scary up here by the 'puter as there are nasty, loud whizz-bangs going off everywhere again.
every year it's the same. starts around the end of october and carries on until the end of november, and it's horrible and scary for us dogs. the only place where it's safe and fairly quiet is under the sofa downstairs when my human draws the curtains and plays nice music to take my mind off it. why do people have to be so noisy?
anyway, to cheer me up, the other day my human took me to a park i'd never been to before which had loads of new sniffs to explore, and a huge field to run around in, and then when we got back home she cooked me an extra special dinner of liver. here's how she made it.

1 pound of calves liver
2 bayleaves
1 clove of garlic, crushed.

put all the ingredients into a large pan, cover with water, bring to the boil then simmer for 20-30 minutes, or until the liver can be cut with a spoon.

leave to cool, and serve asap!

yummy, and very good for one's health as well!

Thursday, October 06, 2005

i got this lovely email from a dog by the name of miss sassy poodle, who owns a very nice human called guyk.

A Dog Talks to God

Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?

Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the " Chrysler Beagle"?

Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?

Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are,will I have to apologize?

Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good dog:

1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.

2. I will not roll on dead squirrels, birds, fish, etc., just because I like the way they smell.

3. The sofa is not a 'face towel'. neither are laps.

4. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

5. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

6. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and registration.

7. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.

8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.

9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.

10. I will not throw up in the car.

11. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.

12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

And, finally, My last question.
Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?

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